HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
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I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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