one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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