We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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