My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
