You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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