Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
