mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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