So drunk its hurt
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize