why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
