Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
