I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Your dad touched me again.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize