Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
