I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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