google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
