R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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