I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
