So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
