soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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