I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
