doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
