Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
