do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
