are you still at the devil's house?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
