Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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