get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
