Grow some girl-balls and come out already
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
