what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Say something about gay babies.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
