Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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