You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
