come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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