a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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