yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
