i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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