First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
