Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
