So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize