all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
