She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize