Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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