There is no way he is gay with that hair.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
