btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
