There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I am spending my child support on dildos
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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