Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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