There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
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