If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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