did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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