this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
He passed out mid-signature
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
