can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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