I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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