White coat. Heels.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
