You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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