Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
