Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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